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Entries for June, 2004

June 1st, 2004

SB Trip Report

Posted by AsceticMonk at 11:42 AM on June 1, 2004.

So the SB trip was a success, although it was a lot of driving and at end it was a tiring day, but everyone enjoyed it, everyone had fun.

We arrived a bit before 8 at a restaurant in LA located between Garvey and Garfield. The reason I chose this restaurant is because it serves close to authentic Chinese breakfast, and I have not had Chinese breakfast for a long time. I remember when I was in college, me and my buddy drove all the way from SD to LA in the early morning just to have breakfast. Hahaha, those crazy old day! In the same plaza, there are some tourism agencies, and at the time that we arrived there were about 5 or 6 gigantic buses at the parking lot unloading tourists. Suddenly the plaza was filled with Chinese people, and from their look and conversation I can tell that they are fresh out of country. My friend told me jokingly that he felt that he was back in China, seeing a massive Chinese crowd flowing in the plaza was indeed a bit strange. Maybe I am no longer accustomed of seeing large crowds. Many of them went into the same restaurant, and were standing in line waiting to order. Just a sidenote, the restaurant is rated C! I was behind an middle-aged man and a short young Chinese girl with her boyfriend, apparently they were getting acquainted, and here is their cold conversation:

Middle-aged Man: Are you from Canton province?
Young Girl: No, I am not.
Middle-aged Man: Oh, so where are you from?
Young Girl: I am from China.
Middle-aged Man: Which part of China?
Young Girl: Canton province. (when I heard this, I almost froze to death)

First we went to the Little Danish Town located north of Santa Barbara, it was small-sized town but it was unique, beautiful and cute. At the lunch, I order a danish dish: Danish Sausage with Red Cabbage. The sausage was okay, nothing too special, but the red cabbage is just too sour for me, so I didn't even touch it. We walked more in the town, all buildings were built with a Northern European style. I notice when we went inside a house, the roof of the house is really low. The house we went in is now a museum. From the tour guide, I found out that the house was hand-built and all the furniture in it were hand-built as well. I have to admit that Danish carpenters are skillful. Everything looked so nice, firm and clever. There was a wooden chair, but it can be converted into a mini stair. The idea is so clever and smart.

After the Danish town, we headed back to Santa Barbara, cruised around downtown, and visited the wharf and the pier. Then we had BBQ on the beach, I was the main chef, and everything came out delicious.

1 tonsured

Queen Mary

Posted by AsceticMonk at 12:38 PM on June 1, 2004.

Monday, me and parents went to Long Beach and visited the gigantic ship, Queen Mary. The ship was commissioned by Cunard Steamship Co., LTD., built and launched September 26, 1934. Looking at it from the port, it is huge and majestic even today. I have never been on a cruise ship of this size. It is truly amazing. It has 12 decks, and 160,000 horsepower. The interior is spacious and at the time luxurious.

In the engine room, we saw a network of pipes, many apparatus and meters. It is miraculous to me that human beings are capable of building a giant like this back then, its complexity and required precision is just overwhelming. The ship is like a floating city, it contains every sort of business that you will find on land. It has a hospital, a gymnasium, many restaurants, bars, drawing room, children's playground, the list just goes on.

Here are some facts about Queen Mary:

War Service: March 1940 - September 1946

War History: Carried a total of 765,429 military personnel. Sailed a total of 569,429 miles (916,407 km). Carried up to 15,000 troops at one time. Carried wounded returning to the United States. Transported Winston Churchill three times to conferences. Carried 12,886 G.I. brides and children.

Retired from Regular Passenger Service: September 19, 1967 (after completing 1,001 crossings of the Atlantic)

Change of Ownership: Removed from British registry and officially turned over ownership to the City of Long Beach at 10:00 a.m., Monday, December 11, 1967.

I highly recommend anyone to see Queen Mary, it was quite educational, and most of all it was unbelievable. After visiting Queen Mary, you will be amazed of what human beings are capable of achieving.

tonsure

When The Last Teardrop Falls

Posted by AsceticMonk at 05:26 PM on June 1, 2004.

when the last teardrop falls
would loneliness be there still
to adopt another orphan of love
cursed to find meaning of life

when the last teardrop falls
would the old magician be there to sell
sell me a golden magical stick
to make everything right and sleek

when the last teardrop falls
would you come back to feel
the heartbreak of century
since then I wander in cemetery

waiting, the last teardrop falls
would the world take a pause
make the grip on my neck loose
and leave me alone to sleep in my tales

tonsure

VS: More Ideas

Posted by AsceticMonk at 09:09 PM on June 1, 2004.

Identification

In this imaginary world, all individuals carry an identification card, on which each one's condensed genetic information is stored. Simply with a scan, the inspector can identify whether you are a superior human being or not. In addition, another copy of the same information is stored in a central database, so the information on the card needs to match the one stored in the database to prove authencity. Therefore, forging the identification card is not a solution, ultimately one needs to hack into the system and alter the information stored in the central database. Thus the underground group is extremely secretive, and very expensive.

Marriage

Marriage across caste is strictly prohibited. Ever since the invention of gene-mapping, the ultimate goal for humanity is to purge out the "bad" and inferior genes. The long-term goal (since killing is not an option) is to eliminate the natural-born humans. Gene-mapped individuals have better health, more resistent to disease and of course sexually more productive. Thus through the law of natural selection, natural-born humans will become extincted.

Religion

Religion is the typical trademark of natural-born humans. For gene-mapped humans, they either believe in themselves or believe in science (kind of like scientology). I think the religions existing among the natural-born humans can still be the religions that exist today.

1 tonsured

June 2nd, 2004

Fahrenheit 9/11

Posted by AsceticMonk at 11:06 AM on June 2, 2004.

A controversial political documentary made by Michael Moore, in which all major US events since 9/11 are discussed and some unknown stories are revealed. The film went on and won the top honor in Cannes film festival, however the initial distributor Disney refused to release the film due to political bias, and the apparent impact on the upcoming presidential election. The good news is Bob and Harvey Weinstein has recently acquired the right from Disney and the Fahrenheit 9/11 is set to be release on June 25th in US. I will definitely see this documentary.

1 tonsured

June 5th, 2004

Emotional Maze

Posted by AsceticMonk at 01:41 AM on June 5, 2004.

When I close my eyes I used to see a person, standing there. Now, that person is gone, and when I close my eyes there is nothing but darkness. So I go on and reminisce the past. When I was awaken around noon, and a bowl of wudong with steamy soup was on the table. My eyes were so blurred that I couldn't see the person's face. But I could hear the voice, sweet and deep, eraser of all my worries. My life used to be precarious but engrossing, imbued with love and romanticism. Now my life is just precarious and monotonous, live for the sake of living. What is the sake? No questions, just pink dream, and more modern fairy tales to squeeze redundant tears, and poke my not-so-sensitive nerves. Dubious and decadent, I have strangled the rose in the valley of death!

tonsure

North and South Koreas

Posted by AsceticMonk at 02:02 PM on June 5, 2004.

It is always good to see the reconciliation happening between countries once were enemies to each other. North and South Koreas now formally open roads through the military buffer zone. The agreement was reached with the condition that South Korea promised to deliver 400,000 tonnes of food aid to the much impoverished North counterpart.

I personally praise South Korea in such humane act, since many people living North Korea are living with scarce food source. This kind of food aid will definitely improve their situation. At the same time I hope that these food aids indeed make their way into the hands of those who are in need, and not confiscated by corrupted and greed-driven officials.

However the ease of tension is a gradual process. For now only officially sanctioned business are granted with the passage. I sincerely hope that one day the two countries will come together, maybe not unified as one but at least without animosity.

2 tonsured

June 7th, 2004

The Tragic Sense of Life

Posted by AsceticMonk at 10:21 AM on June 7, 2004.

I discern myself looking forward of events that take place in the future, and using such expectations to elicit support of my existence. It seems that the only excitements of my numb existence are these few events that always dwell in the future. I found myself constantly expecting, waiting and anxiously thinking about these event, and often overlook the present or simply ignore the present.

Life has rather become a monotonus routine, in which I perform my duty daily almost without excuses, in return I receive monetary equivalent of my lifetime consumed. It is simply ironic! The money I receive is used to prolong this much disgusting experience, the life that I curse with such venom. Yet I have to remind myself constantly that I am lucky, I am fortunate and I should be happy. I do admit the facts but at same time I keep getting swallowed by this void in my heart.

So what is the purpose of this life?

He said that when this question is asked, your life's purpose is already found. Seek no more, maybe the purpose of this life is simply to find a purpose. But if this were the truth, then isn't life seemingly pathetic and tragic. Maybe the brighter ones already tasted this irony, and maybe this is the very reason behind Unamuno's The Tragic Sense of Life.

You might argue with me that life is colorful and meaningful, and I already said that I do admit the facts. But if you go deeper into the matter, and the quest of ultimate journey, you just can't avoid those greater questions, like knife dangling above your head, ready to pierce your skull any moment and any time. So you fear, you quiver, you cry, you despair and eventually you have to go on, masking yourself just like anyone else to blend in the crowd, nevertheless constantly haunted by the questions.

It is exhausting and tiring. When the search begin, you are already doomed with disillusion and discontent. I read, I go to sermon, I listen and I write, but the elusive answer can never be caught. It's like holding water in your hand, you think you got it, but you have nothing. So it takes some time before you realizing the inevitable and the impossible. Now the only solution and cure is to escape, to avoid and to ignore, but you know you will never succeed, and that's the tragic sense of life to me.

tonsure

Perfect Romance

Posted by AsceticMonk at 01:29 PM on June 7, 2004.

Conversing with you online last night feels surreal. I am here in US and you are over there in Northern Europe. Between us is not just immense oceans and continents, but a history and past that could scar me even till this day. Now I am just talking to you like a friend, maintain that distance, a distance I dread before, a distance that is part of us now.

In my hotmail account I still have all your e-mails saved. For what? I don't know, but I cannot deny that they are all part of me, the present me. Maybe when love fails, it is this sharp contrast that hurts me the most. Memories play like a movie, pink background and soap bubbles float in the air, and there was you and me, hugging and kissing. Now in solitude, they have all turned into phantoms to cast a melancholic spell on me, trap me in sadness.

Yes, I do, sometimes I read all those e-mails again, experiencing the whole break-up again. Sometimes it is so obvious the absence of love in your words, and it is so stupid for me to be such a persistent fool. I was fooling no one but myself, my own perfect romance, and indeed I was hurting both of us. Now I understand, parting might just be the best solution of our relationship.

------ written after 6 months

tonsure

June 8th, 2004

Transits of Venus

Posted by AsceticMonk at 04:33 PM on June 8, 2004.

One of the rarest planetary alignments, Transits of Venus, is taking place today. According to reports, such event had only occurred six times since the invention of telescope (1631, 1639, 1761, 1769, 1874 and 1882). However the event can only be observed if there is a cloudless sky, and for the past few days SD is having cloudy skies, so sucks!

On this day half our globe will be able to watch the tiny black dot of the planet Venus moving across the disc of the sun. Given a cloudless sky, all you'll need is a sun filter to follow the spectacle for several hours by your naked eyes.


I guess I just have to wait for the next event, which will occur on 2012 June 06. I hope SD will have a clear sky, and I will still be alive by then.

tonsure

June 9th, 2004

《借我一生》

Posted by AsceticMonk at 12:08 AM on June 9, 2004.

最近在閲讀《愛與痛的邊緣》,讀到了很多兩余之爭的文章。其實個人的爭論只是表面問題,主要的還是兩個人對懺悔的不同看法,和懺悔在當今中國重要性的分歧。可是卻挑起了我對余秋雨過去的好奇,他到底在文化大革命時期擔當了什麼樣的一個角色?今天在綠土地看到了這則新聞:

在眾多爭議面前表示不作自辯的余秋雨,近日終于打破沉默,將在《收獲》今年第4期推出他的最新長篇“記憶文學”《借我一生》,首次披露許多鮮為人知的曆史真相,真切敘述自己的人生曆程。

這部讓余秋雨在寫作中“常常淚流不止”的作品,著重于他成為當代文化學者的成長史,其中包括余秋雨對自己人生經曆的一系列描繪與思考。特別值得一提的是余秋雨對自己在“文革”中的一段經曆并沒有回避,從戲劇學院,到軍墾農場,再到《朝霞》事件……他都一一作了回顧,澄清了許多曆史疑點。

據悉,《借我一生》將在7月初亮相,屆時,讀者除了更深入地了解余秋雨的生活和思想,還將再次領略他充滿激情的文體實驗與創造。


看來余秋雨要再次澄清了,我很有興趣看看這本常常令他淚流不止的作品。

tonsure

June 10th, 2004

Past Mid-Night Thought

Posted by AsceticMonk at 01:01 AM on June 10, 2004.

Maybe the right one will never show up in my life, because I had already killed her in my mind, and now I am just a blind man.

tonsure

Murder of 11 Chinese Workers

Posted by AsceticMonk at 10:23 AM on June 10, 2004.

Although not much news coverage is devoted on Afghanistan recently, but do not think that the country is now safe and secure. Since the fallout of Taliban, the country is still in the process of rebuilding and reconstruction, and many places of the country are still struggling with terror and violence. Just today BBC News reported the murder of 11 Chinese construction workers and killings of 5 Medecins sans Frontieres employees. As far as I know, this is the first time that Chinese citizens are murdered in Afghanistan since the start of the recent conflict. If I recall correctly, Chinese citizens were abducted in Iraq but shortly freed. So this is the first time, and the number is not small.

The murdered Chinese workers were employees of a Chinese company which is rebuilding roads in Iraq. The occurrence of such attack on soft targets reveals once again the terror and insecurity of the region, and also the new government's incompetence of protecting people in the country. After these incidents and other attacks that happened recently, foreign aid community is in shock and disbelief, and some took drastic measure such as to cease operation or furthermore to pullout from the area.

All NGOs and all expatriate workers have now left Badghis, most of them at the weekend, when an Italian NGO compound was attacked with grenades in the provincial capital.


With such fear and insecurity felt by many foreign workers, the process of rebuilding and reconstruction is greatly affected. So the foremost priority in Afghanistan is to achieve and enforce security, and international community needs to give more concern over the security of these foreign workers.

tonsure

June 11th, 2004

Lost Treasures

Posted by AsceticMonk at 10:30 AM on June 11, 2004.

Getting back what used to be ours ...

China has made its demand for the return of cutural relics that are currently stored in many western museums. An estimation shows that about a million Chinese historical treasures are kept in more than 200 museums in 47 countries, many were plundered during war. However the demand has been answered by refusals from some museums in US and Europe.

Among the museums that refused China's request were the Louvre in Paris, New York's Metropolitan Museum of Art and the Prado in Madrid.


Meantime, we should never forget why these precious artefacts ended up in hands of foreigners in the first place. To reflect and digest on the cause of these tragic cultural property lose is more important than just blindly requesting back. Only throught such reflection, I believe we are able to prevent history from repeat itself; only the remembrance of past humiliation can fuel our strength to become a better and stronger nation. We should not forget, we should remember and learn from our mistakes and painful humiliations!

1 tonsured

Random Phrases

Posted by AsceticMonk at 02:49 PM on June 11, 2004.


  • If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

  • The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing in the right place, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.

  • If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody.

  • If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

tonsure

June 13th, 2004

Ronald Reagan

Posted by AsceticMonk at 10:06 AM on June 13, 2004.

Indeed I hesitate a bit about writing this journal entry, an entry about the week-long mourning of Ronald Reagan. During this past week, Ronald Reagan has been the central topic of all media. Since his death on Saturday June 5th, 2004, the media seemed to have nothing but only one task and one purpose: to cover the week-long state ceremonies and the subsequent final burial. Although the majority of the media has dealt the events with somber tones and nostalgic attitude, nevertheless there were still some critical voices. One day, when I tuned in to Stacy Taylor on KOGO, there was actually a caller that were using Ray Charles' death to mock the ongoing mourning of Ronald Reagan.

As someone who did not live through Ronald Reagan's presidency, and does not know much about him and his accoplishments, I was surprised at the degree of importance of this former president. During the week, I slowly realized that the majority of the American people loved this president, and respect him tremendously, at least that was the picture that I got from the main media. Of course I could not avoid of thinking that maybe death glorified and aggrandized the person, which often happens in human society. The opposite view were available, for instance Not Even a Hedgehog, the author Christopher Hitchens presented his version of Reagan's presidency, and he regards the man as stupidity.

Needless to say I am quite confused when receiving two different types of information, I could not make my mind on the matter. It is one thing to pay respect to a former president, regardless of his faults or accomplishments, he did his serving and he did his job; but at the same time I am against the tendency of making someone's deeds all glorifying and rewrite the history in any other way, just because the person is dead, and thus in death he becomes perfect and ideal.

Until I read this article on The Christian Science Monitor, The Rise of Mourning in America, I thought maybe this is the correct angle and attitude to perceive the event. In this article, the author emphasized the event's impact on the current political situation.

For a week, national politics took a pause. So did an increasingly bitter presidential campaign.

......

The nation wants a timeout, and Ronald Reagan's death gives us a timeout to rediscover in this week what holds us together instead of what pulls us apart," says Kevin Starr, a historian at the University of Southern California.

......

"Mourning does not necessarily express grief," says Barry Schwartz, a sociologist who has written on the Lincoln and Kennedy funerals. "It need not necessarily even express sorrow, but it is a social obligation."

Indeed, to many watching on television or in sweltering Washington waiting lines, the ceremonies that end Friday are a reminder of the power of presidential rituals to bind a nation together, at least for a while.

......

While the bitter divisions in American politics circa 2004 do not reach Lincoln-era levels, they are much more pronounced than in Reagan's day. Florida's long ballot count, disputes over gay marriage and abortion, and widening gaps over the Iraq war have split the nation at every level, from the courts to the makeup of Congress. More than half of Americans now believe the country is on the wrong track.

"This grief for Ronald Reagan is not somber. It's not the grief of an interrupted life that attached itself to President Kennedy. It's more of a public civic mourning: This man had a good life, and we're celebrating that life and what it's essential message is: That of the fundamental validity of American civilization," says California historian Starr.


So maybe after a week of retrospect and introspection, American people will gain more insights and wisdom to deal with the current national and international problems that it faces, and let the division to serve as a verification of correct judgement not a battle to divide the nation, and furthermore to remember the fundamental validity of American civilization. Maybe then the debate on whether Ronald Reagan was a good president or not will seems to be quite off-topic.

2 tonsured

June 15th, 2004

SD Shakes A Little

Posted by AsceticMonk at 04:19 PM on June 15, 2004.

Around 3:30pm, I was at work as usual. Sitting in my comfortable chair and talking to my co-worker, then I felt a mild shake from my chair, lasted about few seconds. First I thought was someone sneaked up from behind and shook my chair, but when I turned around no one was around. Then other co-workers in my laboratory also confirmed that they felt the shake too. Finally from news sites we confirmed that we have just suffered a 5.2 magnitude earthquake.

A 5.2-magnitude earthquake centered off the coast of Baja California shook San Diego on Tuesday afternoon, but there were no immediate reports of damage or injury.

The temblor struck abut 3:28 p.m. and was centered about 60 miles west of Tijuana, Mexico, said Deborah Hedges, a spokeswoman for seismologists at the California Institute of Technology in Pasadena.


So for those who are still wondering the cause: YES! It was an earthquake. Hopefully everyone in SD area is safe and sound.

4 tonsured

June 17th, 2004

Thought For The Day

Posted by AsceticMonk at 04:33 PM on June 17, 2004.


  1. Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

  2. All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

  3. In the 60's people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

  4. Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.

1 tonsured

June 19th, 2004

Back From The Terminal

Posted by AsceticMonk at 12:13 AM on June 19, 2004.

Just coming back from the movie theater, and the movie was The Terminal, directed by Steven Spielberg, casted by Tom Hanks and Catherine Zeta-Jones. A story full of all kinds of human emotions, from the start of the movie, you would experience different emotions: love, sadness, loneliness, hatred, frustration, and list just goes on and on. The story is very straightforward, however it is not plain and senseless. If one looks deeper, then you will find another layer of expressions and meanings underneath the surface, at same time everything is brushed with a right amount of humor. You will laugh, but not because of the ridicule, but because of the purity. It is being humorous and without sacrificing the quality of the plot. The acting of Tom Hanks is just amazing and supreme. He will definitely convince you in the movie that he does not speak English and he is from another country. So to keep my review short, and without giving away the movie, get up right now and go to see this movie. You'll love it, I guarantee it!

tonsure

GMail

Posted by AsceticMonk at 12:42 AM on June 19, 2004.

Thanks to HeXuM at gfxOasis for generously sending me an invitation, now I am officially a happy owner of a GMail account. I just signed up my account, still learning features that GMail offers, there are many, and I need to learn to use them. The interface is clean and simple, just like the usual style of Google. I hope I will be getting some invitations to send out soon, so I can share this wonderful thing with many of my friends.

2 tonsured

June 21st, 2004

Beheading of Hostages

Posted by AsceticMonk at 12:24 AM on June 21, 2004.

It seems to me that the terrorist is utilizing this beheading act to further terrifying the international community. The recent Nick Berg's beheading, and last week's Paul Johnson, they all follow the same pattern: demand, deadline and beheading of the hostage. The act itself is gruesome and chilling. I simply cannot imagine any human being capable of carry out such inhuman and cruel action. I thought it was a trademark of the feudalitic society that we have long left behind; I thought humans have long evolved into more civilized beings, and such act should be vanished from our lives, and only be found in history books. But I guess I am wrong.

Now Islamic militants in Iraq are threaten to kill another Korean hostage, and demanding that South Korea withdraws its troops and stop the plan of sending more troops to Iraq. The tape was aired on the Arabic TV channel al-Jazeera, and the deadline is set at sunset on Monday.

In the video released by the militants, Kim Sun-il, a 33-year-old translator working for a company that supplies the US army, screams: "Korean soldiers, please get out of here. I don't want to die. My life is important"

1 tonsured

Letter in Blood

Posted by AsceticMonk at 01:09 PM on June 21, 2004.

Weird things do happen all over the world, some are inexplicable and other are just plainly chilling and horrifying. Yahoo! News reports that a high school teacher punished a student for falling asleep in his class by writing an apology letter in blood. The teacher took the student to the staff room, and handed the student a box-cutter and paper. The student then followed his order by cutting his own finger and wrote an apology letter in his own blood.

After the incident, the teacher confessed his action to the high school principal and apologized for his bizarre way of punishment to the 17-year-old boy. What is more bizarre is the fact that no complaints were voiced by boy's parents and the teacher is not suspended and will resume his teaching in a few days.

Since no complaints were heard from boy's parents, I assume that the parents acquiesce such punishment, or is such punishment normal in the Japanese society? The punishment reminds me the old ways of Samurai, for instance: killing yourself when you are defeated by your enemy because you cannot bear the shame of being defeated. In the old time, when people write letter or declaration in blood, usually it symbolized the degree of determination of the person, but the act is self-motivated not an order from someone. However in this particular incident, such punishment is simply bizarre and odd, the only thing I can say is that this teacher has some psychological problem for punishing his student in such way, or many people in Japan are still innately and subconsciously violent in nature, and believe in violence. Furthermore, it is shocking to me that the teacher is not suspended or even investigated. At least he should receive a thorough investigation of his state of mind, and effort needs to be made to understand why he chose to punish student in such seemingly violent way. But quite contrary, he is allowed to be back in a few day, what is the shool principal thinking? Shouldn't the parents of all students be worried of this individual, who knows what kinds of bizarre and chilling punishment he might come up next time? And finally how would this student face him in the future, with indelible fear?

tonsure

iPod and BMW

Posted by AsceticMonk at 02:23 PM on June 21, 2004.

The creative Apple never cease to amaze and lure consumers to spend more money on its products. Now Apple has announced a new adapter which is able to connect iPod with some BMW and Mini Cooper models, so users can play the music library using the conventional controls on cars' steering wheel.

Apple and BMW AG (BMWG.DE) said in a joint statement that the adapter, priced at $149, would work in BMW's 3 Series, Z4 Roadster, X3 and X5 SUVs and the Mini Cooper, and will be powered by the car, not the iPod's battery.

Drivers plug the iPod into a cable in the car's glove compartment and then can control the iPod using the standard buttons on the steering wheel, the companies said.


Unfortunately I do not own an iPod, nor a BMW, so I can only drool over this wonderful news.

tonsure

June 23rd, 2004

She Is Back

Posted by AsceticMonk at 01:05 AM on June 23, 2004.

I know she is back today, June 22nd. Most likely in LA, since that digusting ex-boyfriend is living there. Probably he went to pick her up too. I guess they are none of my business now, but I just can't stop thinking about her and where is she now? I guess I still care about her, wishing that she would be so nice to give me a call, and tell me that she is back and that she missed me all these months. Maybe she would even tell me that she regretted our break-up, and now she wishes to be back together. Hahaha, you see, I am a stupid pathetic moron, still dreaming the impossible, still fantasizing a silly modern fairy tale. Yes, the fact is she has moved on, and it seems to me that she moved on easily, like a breeze. On the other hand I am still trapped, hurt and never got out of this nightmare. I blame her in my heart, even though my brain tells me not to, my logic tells me that I am being irrational, immature, but I do, I just do. She hurt me so much and I am a love fool, never completely let her go, even now.

tonsure

June 24th, 2004

Corruption in China

Posted by AsceticMonk at 12:56 AM on June 24, 2004.

Corruption in China is so common that it has become a norm or a standard. If you are some sort of government official, and you don't use your existing position and power to gather your personal fortune, then you are probably a retard. Another corruption case has surfaced in China's state-run media, and this time is under the name of 2008 Olympics.

China's auditor general has found that money for Olympic projects has been siphoned off from China's 2003 budget, the state-run media reported.


According to auditor general Li Jinhua's report, 1.4bn yuan is missing. Through his investigation, malpractices are found in many major departments. Often these missing money has gone into pockets of staff members or to office building constructions. Li also found that many aid money aimed to help farmers in poverty has also gone missing. Often the money never reached into hands of suffering peasants, but into pockets of officials.

Since 1999, the General Administration of Sports has appropriated 131m yuan ($13.2m) earmarked for the Beijing 2008 Olympics organising committee.

The bulk of this - 109m yuan - was spent on building homes for the organising committee's staff, the auditor general's report found.


Shocking? It is probably just a tip of an iceberg.

In Chongqing, southwest China, only 0.3% of total poverty relief funds ended up in the hands of farmers, the auditor's report has found.


For the blood-sucking officials, these are probably some extra money. But to the impoverished farmers, it could mean the lives of the entire family. While these officials eat and drink in 5-star restaurants, farmers are starving in cold rooms, and their kids dropped out of schools because the family cannot afford the tuition. If China wants to be strong, it definitely needs to get rid of corruption. These corrupted officials are not just stealing money, but they are killing people, they are bloody murderers.

tonsure

Hotmail Upgrade

Posted by AsceticMonk at 01:41 PM on June 24, 2004.

So finally Hotmail has taken some actions to respond the current web email storage boost. Yahoo! expanded its free email account storage to 100MB, Spymac announced it 1GB free web-based email account not long ago, and now with GMail invitations flowing all over the net, Hotmail cannot keep silent anymore, they need to take immediate action in order to stay in this recent competition. With millions of accounts in Hotmail, I wonder how much would they expand?

Hotmail users will see storage for free accounts increase to 250 megabytes, from 2 megabytes, later this summer.Users also will be able to send larger attachments, up to 10 megabytes.


Cool! I guess consumers are the sole benefactor of this storage competition. At same time, I hope this is not an opportunity for a rise of spam, hopefully someone will come out with a mechanism to stop spam soon, because they are driving me crazy!

4 tonsured

June 25th, 2004

F-Word From Cheney

Posted by AsceticMonk at 12:09 AM on June 25, 2004.

Our Vice President Cheney just tested our democracy from another angle. Who says vice president cannot use F-word? As a citizen of U.S.A, he too enjoys the freedom of speech. Besides, these days what else is not allowed? If Clinton could play cigars in his office, then Cheney might as well drop some F-bombs on other senates, just to show them that do not mess with his head.

Vice President Dick Cheney blurted out the "F word" at Democratic Sen. Patrick Leahy of Vermont during a heated exchange on the Senate floor, congressional aides said on Thursday.

The incident occurred on Tuesday in a terse discussion between the two that touched on politics, religion and money, with Cheney finally telling Leahy to "f--- off" or "go f--- yourself," the aides said.


But what was it that made our Vice President so mad? What was the topic of the discussion?

Cheney, who is president of the Senate, then ripped into Leahy for the Democratic senator's criticism this week of alleged war profiteering in Iraq by Halliburton, the oil services company that Cheney once ran.

Leahy and other Democrats have called for congressional hearings into whether the vice president helped the firm win lucrative contracts in Iraq after the U.S.-led war that toppled Saddam Hussein.


Wow, that's pretty big accusation, no wonder Cheney lost his temper there. I mean intellectual discussion is one thing, hitting someone's sore spot is just wrong. So yes, Cheney is right, drop some F-bombs, show them the gangster style, just like the lyrics of some raps. Maybe next time, learn from Taiwan, just get close to Sen. Patrick Leahy and slap him like your little b**ch.

tonsure

Our Leaders Lie

Posted by AsceticMonk at 12:53 AM on June 25, 2004.

I came across this small video clip on WhatReallyHappened. The video segment is from The Daily Show With Jon Stewart on Comedy Central, in which a series of TV interviews and speeches from our leaders are compiled. It reveals ridiculously how our leaders and government lie to the people. I've downloaded the clip and uploaded onto my own server, just in case the link on WhatReallyHappened dies in a couple of days. I am planning to host this clip for awhile, so go ahead download it and watch for yourself how our leaders lie constantly and shamelessly, and the lies are so stupid that they can't even trick a child.

1 tonsured

June 27th, 2004

Woman Gives Birth To Frog

Posted by AsceticMonk at 10:20 PM on June 27, 2004.

Just want to share this rather peculiar news report, an Iranian newspaper has reported a woman has given birth to a frog. The speculation is that she picked up the larva while swimming in a dirty pool. Just last week we had a report of Super Boy in Germany, now we have a woman giving birth to a frog, bizarre events just can't stop popping up around the world. Maybe mutants do exist among us, hahahaha ..., pardon me, I am just letting my imagination running free.

While it is unclear how this could have happened, the paper carries quotes from medical experts who say there are human characteristics to the animal.

1 tonsured

June 28th, 2004

Fahrenheit 9/11 Review

Posted by AsceticMonk at 12:03 AM on June 28, 2004.

I took the time this Sunday afternoon and went to La Jolla's Landmark theater to see the most anticipated documentary film Fahrenheit 9/11. Before the film release, I thought that most of movie theaters in SD area will play this film, but I was wrong. Major theaters, like Edwards and AMC, do not carry this politically controversial documentary. We were only able to see the film in small theaters that play mostly independent films. However such small unconvinience did not stop me in anyway from seeing this film, me and my buddies arrived one and half hour earlier and purchased the tickets.

My long time high school friend, now living in Maryland, called me hours before. He informed me that he was in line in the local theater waiting to see Fahrenheit 9/11. He planned to see it on Friday night, right after work, but unfortunately it was sold out. So he waited until Sunday, even it means that he has to see the film by himself. Hours later he called me and told me that it was a great and well-done film, and he enjoyed every bit of it. So despite of the sharp and organized criticism before the movie release, it seems apparent to me that most people still went on to see this movie.

During the two hours of the movie, I was shocked, saddened and I cried. Shocked, because I was exposed to so much new information and I was terrified of the intentional effort from government to cover up these disturbing information. Before the movie I thought I was a pretty well-informed individual but I was wrong again. I believe that most of information presented in the film are truthful, maybe organized in a way to embody Michael Moore's view better, but these information certainly did not make their way into the mainstream media. People have the rights to know these pieces of information, and leave them alone to make their own judgements. If government intentionally hides the information, then it is manipulating its people to think in certain way, and that's certainly not democracy.

The financial patnership between Bush and BinLaden's family is truly disturbing, just as Michael Moore suggested, it certainly carries a tremendous influence on the decision making of this president. I was also shocked of the financial might that Saudi Arabia has in this country, trillians dollars in U.S., that's certainly enough money to destroy U.S. economy if one day they decide to pull out all their assets. I was also shocked of the size and location of Saudi's embassy in U.S., and how heavily guarded it was. It was plainly out of my imagination.

And then comes war. The testimonials from active duty soldiers, veterans and soldier's families. The soldiers in the war zone, some are frightened, some are worried, a lot of them are disoriented, not knowing the reason and purpose of their mission and stay. Others simply plug their helmet with heavy-metal rock music, and let themselves loose into a killing frenzy. There were madness and also deep reflections, but after all there were just evil and atrocities caused by war, any war, and this war is no exception.

I could not stop my tears from falling during the testimonial of a soldier's mother. She suffers so much pain, so much confusion and so much frustration. Her son is gone, and gone forever, and she just could not find a righteous justification of his death.

I think the movie is great and well-crafted. It brought people together, at least that's what I felt in the theater. I think instead of giving ignorant and extremely harsh criticisms, we should just reflect on this war and this administration more. Do not blindly follow by any media, or any news commentators, do your own research if you want to know the truth, do your own thinking instead of having others do for you and telling you what opinion or view you suppose to have. Think deeper, think like an independent human being, and judge for yourself what is right and wrong. As I said before these days there are just too many people blind and ignorant, and democracy does not grow well in ignorance. So don't just read this blog and take in my words, go see this movie for yourself, get the information and do your own thinking.

1 tonsured

June 30th, 2004

Precious Entries

Posted by AsceticMonk at 01:57 AM on June 30, 2004.

I have always valued words in an almost exaggerated way. To me words are precious, they can do a lot more than just simple interpersonal communication. Sometimes they can reach into your soul, sometimes they are simply living fossils of specific times. Therefore I value my own words and writings very much. I like to keep them. Whenever I've written something that I think it is a good description of my being and my time, I want to keep them and not lose them. Naturally they became part of me, part of life, part of reason for living.

So when Tabulas broke down today, I was extremely worried of all my journal entries. I do not want to lose them, I want to back them up. However sometimes things just happen unexpectedly in life, let alone a wonderful free service like Tabulas. As a site owner myself, I understand the time and effort one puts in to maintain a community and to strive to keep everyone happy, it is hard-working and sometimes it can be tiring. These lead me to think that maybe eventually I should have my own domain, and have my own blog, instead of storing journal entries on someone else's server, and knowing that some disasters might be around the corner, ready to cast an eternal regret on me.

2 tonsured

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